Reflections in a Mirror: 2025, July 6th – Stream of Consciousness
An unfiltered stream of consciousness exploring daily life, meditation practice, work with AI, and dreams of opening a meditation retreat center.
Not quite sure what I’m going to write today, but Spirit’s kinda telling me I need to write – (Amusement). It’s been a while since I’ve written anything, other than coding for work. (Contemplates the themes coming up for him). I suppose one thing coming up for me is writer’s block in relation to my book I am writing. I have 4 chapters out, but they were kinda easy to write; this latest chapter seems to be harder due to how much I want to get it right… (Amusement). The perfectionism tendency does tend to stop progress.
I used to write a lot on an old blogging website called Xanga that shut down many years ago. It helped me immensely to write out my thoughts and to reflect and introspect. Large portions of my life were shared there, and now I suppose they might be shared here. I used to write journal entries that were just about the goings-on in my life, and about my thoughts related to spirituality, humanity, living… that sort of thing.
Life:
We went to a dog park today and let Toffi run around and play. He was very happy getting to go out and play, then we ate at a nearby restaurant and the food was pretty decent, little on the expensive side, but decent. We got Toffi two ice creams, one at the park and one at the restaurant, but he didn’t really eat either. They were doggy ice creams; not really sure what’s in them.
After that we came home and I meditated for like 2 hours I think. I’d meditated that morning too, but I put together a curated list of videos to kinda reflect on and meditate to, and then just started listening to it for 2-ish hours while meditating.
The dog started barking quite a bit during it though… lol. Made it a little difficult to maintain focus or lack of focus… Not sure which it is when you’re mainly abiding in the resting state with sort of a diffuse awareness of everything. I tend to switch back and forth between the diffuse awareness of my body and the energy and sensations running through it and particular energy sensations and patterns in my third eye and heart chakra, and sometimes crown. Been feeling called to meditate more and more lately… not sure why, just am… so I do.
Work’s going well. Not much to report there, though Claude Code is surprisingly useful at coding in general. It’s made me a lot more productive than I normally am, and made programming a little fun and interesting again. (Amusement) – Wonder what I’m going to do when AI is good enough to replace me… (Shrugs). Suppose I’ll just learn a new skill, or one of my current skills will evolve alongside AI and some sort of balance will be achieved, or it will enable me to do something I couldn’t before and a new path will open up before me.
Maybe I could open a darkness retreat… (Amusement). Why does land and development have to be so expensive? A meditation center with some Starlink Internet would be right up my alley. Then I’d have free access to the darkness retreat and my income wouldn’t be tied to someone else, and I could disappear for a month or two per year to go do my own wanderlust thing – one month in the darkness, one month in the jungle maybe…
I’d have to space it out; I don’t think Kitten could handle me being gone for two months straight no contact… lol. (Looks at his post). I suppose this is the most unpolished and unfiltered I’ve been on this particular platform… This is how I used to write when I was on Xanga. Kinda all over the place, just thought streams meandering their way onto the page. I’d write and write and write… lol. Suppose all the writing did get me better at writing and expressing myself. I stopped after Xanga shut down and after my wrists started to bother me from repetitive strain injuries I sustained while working at a call center.
Even now I feel my wrist hurting as I write. I’m not the best at expressing myself verbally though; don’t know, there is just a huge difference between how I speak and how I write, least I think so.
Anyway… I feel the energies pulling away, so I think whatever needed to be expressed has been expressed.
May whoever needed to hear these words, whenever you read them, bring exactly what you need for your own Life Path. May peace favor you – (Slight bowing gesture).